The Land Down Under is a gorgeous nation with countless beaches, long sunny days, and some of the nicest people you'll ever meet. The plane trip to get there is as tedious and patience-testing as they come, but when you finally arrive and get to breathe Australian air and see Australian scenery, it's all worth it. You just want to be careful around the wildlife...
We kid because we love, Australia. Seriously though, what's up with all the snakes? And how are we supposed to enjoy all those beaches when we're worrying about sharks and jellyfish? How are we supposed to sleep comfortably with all the deadly spiders? Why do you have to be so dangerous?
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1. There's a golf course in Australia with sharks in the water hazards.
In fact, Carbrook Golf Club in Queensland uses it in their marketing, saying, "Our hazards are deadly!"
2. The character of Crocodile Dundee was based on a real man, Rod Ansell, who survived 56 days in the crocodile-infested Outback — but his story didn't have a happy ending.
In 1999, high on speed and raving about Freemasons kidnapping his kids, Rod shot and wounded two of his neighbors, then turned his gun on the police, killing one and wounding another before being brought down by a hail of bullets.
Because the Outback is so big and empty, nobody knows for sure. But the cult Aum Shinrikyo — the ones responsible for sarin gas attacks in Tokyo in 1995 — owned 500,000 acres of Outback in an area where, in 1993, truck drivers and gold prospectors reported massive rumblings and flashes in the sky. Seismologists recorded the blast and noted it was 170 times more powerful than the largest recorded mining explosion in all of Australia, packing the force of about 2,000 tons of high explosives. It has never been determined, however, whether the blast came from a nuke or a meteor — but no impact crater was ever found, either. And after a raid on the site, authorities found the same chemicals used in the gas attacks as well as evidence that the cult had been mining uranium.
The gympie gympie tree is one of the world's most venomous plants, known to kill dogs, horses, and even some humans. Every part of the gympie gympie tree, aside from the roots, is covered in fine hairs that deliver the plant's toxin when you touch it. The pain of a gympie gympie sting starts with a slow burn and builds into achy joints, swelling in your armpits, and a sensation of "being burnt with acid and electrocuted at the same time." That pain can come back years later, and even a dried bit of the tree can cause a sting a hundred years after it's been picked.
5. A feral pig in Australia once raided a campsite and got drunk on 18 beers before starting a fight with a cow.
The cow chased it off, and the pig was last seen napping under a tree.
6. Australia lost a Prime Minister — literally.
In December 1967, nearly two years after Harold Holt was sworn in as Prime Minister, he went for a swim at one of his favorite beaches. Soon after entering the water, Holt disappeared from view and was never seen again. Even the largest search operation in the nation's history didn't turn up a trace.
7. A hand-sized insect known as the tree lobster can only be found on Australia's Ball's Pyramid, a spire of rock in the Pacific Ocean.
It was actually thought to be extinct, but scientists found it and have tried to revive the giant stick insect species.
8. In addition to all the snakes, spiders, jellyfish, and deadly plants, Australia is home to a venomous snail.
The cone snail's venom is incredibly painful and can cause muscle paralysis, vision impairment, respiratory failure, and death. And it's small enough that you can step on it without even noticing...
9. A 62-mile long supercolony of ants was discovered in the city of Melbourne.
Formed by an invasive species of Argentine ants, they no longer attack one another, so their population numbers have exploded.
10. Cyclists in Australia have been known to outfit their helmets with spikes to ward off magpie attacks.
The attacks typically happen during mating season, especially when the eggs have hatched.
11. In addition to all the spiders, snakes, jellyfish, plants, and snails, there are the ticks.
Specifically, the aptly-named Australian Paralysis Tick, which can latch on and spend days feeding on you while delivering a toxin that causes flu-like symptoms, rashes, an unsteady gait, weak limbs, and partial facial paralysis.
12. Australia has the world's oldest known underground coal fire.
Burning Mountain, mistaken by explorers for a volcano, is believed to have been burning for 6,000 years.
13. To scare even more tourists, Australians invented a creature called the "drop bear."
The bear, a koala with a surprising taste for flesh, supposedly drops from trees to attack tourists. Of course, there is no such animal as the drop bear.
14. In addition to the spiders, snakes, jellyfish, plants, snails, and ticks, there's the Colt clan.
Every country has its problem citizens, but this one is just icky and horrifying.
In Australia's worst case of child abuse, the Colt clan started with a brother and sister and, living in a remote, hilly area, degenerated into neglect, interbreeding, cruelty to animals, depravity, and a family tree that makes European royalty look normal.
15. In Australia, the trees have been known to explode.
Producers of highly flammable oil, eucalyptus trees are terrifying fire hazards even when they're not dry. And when they are on fire, all that oil can explode, which earned them the nickname "gasoline trees."
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