Yard sales can be an affordable way to find bargains on things you need, or things you didn't even know you wanted, and in some cases things you didn't even know were a thing. You can learn a lot about the people in your neighborhood by sifting through their unwanted junk.
But then there are those yard sales you just happen to stumble across, where the birds don't seem to be singing in the trees, the sky seems to darken a little above the lawn, and chills go down your spine as you walk up the driveway. You were drawn to this sale, not by choice, but because the curses need you...
1. This most terrifying rocking horse looks primed to steal the soul of anyone brave enough to mount it.
2. If you play it backwards, everyone gets younger but fatter.
3. A pilgrim holding Uncle Sam's head. This is what my nightmare fuel was looking for.
4. This demon doll looks like it's transfixed on the next soul it is about to torment and possess.
5. Would seem that someone was really optimistic and then really disappointed. Also, I'd be scanning the table for small, sharp, pointy objects.
6. I can't imagine that any little girl wouldn't love to curl up beside this lovely doll each night, and listen to all the murderous plans it has for her.
7. I guess when times get hard, you either sell your stuff or sell yourself.
8. Oh look, a box of bones! Deer? Check. Shark? Check. Human hand? Check. Fish?... WAIT WHAT?
9. Looks like Christopher Robin's much-ignored little sister started a blood feud in Hundred Acre Woods and demanded Pooh's skin as a sacrifice.
10. I really do hope people know that if you buy stuff like this at a yard sale, the curses transfer with the ownership.
11. For those days you're just dying to go to someone else's funeral...
12. No, he's just not sure if they're dead YET.
13. You could convince your kids to eat their vegetables with this horrifying clown watching over the dinner table.
14. If you ever have a house guest you don't like, save this cup for their morning coffee.
15. If he keeps looking at people like that, he's just going to keep "staying locked up."
16. Things that make you feel better when you're sad: puppies, kittens, sunshine. Not listed: THIS!
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