Tuesday, March 7, 2017

We Really Should Have Read The Fine Print

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Whenever we're about buy something that promises to make our lives better, the right way to go is to pretty much become a detective. If it claims it can make our hair grow, whiten our teeth and taste like cinnamon, it's time to check all of those for little asterisks.

Of course, it gets even worse if there isn't any label and someone's trying to do the selling themselves. I feel like the next time I try to buy a car, I should show up with a trenchcoat and a notepad. Every time the dealer says pretty much anything, I'd just start writing stuff down while giving them a suspicious eye every now and then. If that doesn't get me a good deal, I don't know what will.

But as ready as we try to be for these kinds of hustles, the truth is that we let ourselves get hustled every day. The problem is that it comes from the people we least suspect.

But because it's really exhausting to keep your guard up all the time, here are a few to watch out for. 

1. I guess a dude in a shopping cart saying "OK, here we go" to a camera is funnier than I thought.

Yeah, this is where you hit 'em with that "what was your favorite part?"

2. The crazy part is that you don't even get to know what the one you're supposed to do in an hour is about.

At the same time, I once got an A by citing Ice Cube as a source in one of those so sometimes this nonsense works out.

3. Yeah, you know you're in trouble if they say "wait, let me balance that out" more than once.

It's like they made a haircut out of those times when you erased so many times you put a hole in the paper.

4. They could've saved us a lot of trouble if they didn't leave that second part out.

A lot of money too, while we're at it.

5. I don't see the problem here. I think she'll be the belle of the ball with this on.

Well, I guess it'll be pretty weird when people keep whispering "I loved you in Boardwalk Empire" during the slow dances. 

6. I'll tell you right now, this kind of thing ain't no accident.

Our brains are actually just as excited when we almost win as when you do win and they know that.

Don't get hustled, y'all.

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Author: verified_user

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