16 Hilarious Ways People Responded To Rejection

Do you know why there are more men in comedy than women? At a disappointingly young age, we're exposed to rejection and embarrassment, and it doesn't end until our late twenties when a woman's biological clock is ticking and she becomes desperate for a mate. So for twenty-some odd years, we had to learn how to make fun of ourselves and the gag-worthy awkwardness we've been causing for so many years. 

Luckily for the entire world, technology has made it very easy to capture and catalog this crippling awkwardness for our absolute enjoyment. How wonderful.

Now, with no further ado, 16 pictures that show why men over the age of 30 are apathetic to everything except sports and people walking on their lawns. We're stunted creatures that need help. 

1. Safe to say he won't be the love doctor.

2.Weak, my man. This would have sealed the deal, "Instead of spreading Nutella, we can just spread your legs."

3. "I can see you don't like my jokes. Would you like to go for Dina instead?"

4. He had a small arsenal of go-to lines, and after that, desperation took over.

5. Strangle cocks that get out of line? In my field of expertise, that's called, "choking the chicken."

6. "Everything is backfiring. Better bust out the avocado line."

7. If he's not going to speak to someone about his daddy issues, this is the next best thing.

8. That last line is the start to every good bukkake scene.

9. He hasn't seen defeat like that since he struck out three times at the only T-ball game his dad ever came to.

10. I've never used Tinder, but I like the premise because at least I can gag on my awkwardness from the privacy of my home.

11. At what point in this exchange of services am I adequately fellated?

12. The old "I got drunk and forgot you existed. Do you remember me?" letter. Classic.

13. "...Seinfeldled me to believe you all had a sense of humor."

14. "Are you sure? I've got a good job and plenty of Monet. I can take you to an Italian place called Da Vinci's. Or I can make you a sandwich with some Dali meat in my fridge."

15. Why end there? Tell him Jar Jar Binks is the Sith Lord. It'll ruin the whole movie for him as he awaits the unexpected appearance of Lord Binks.

Main image via imgur / aionis

Collage image via WittyFeed