Looking back, there were some really crazy things people did to themselves in the name of fashion, and even the ones we think we know about turn out to be super gross when we know the truth of how the effect was actually achieved. Here are 13 of the weirdest.
1. Waterloo teeth.
Teeth were a big problem before modern dentistry. Those who could afford to replace their rotten teeth got dentures, often of ivory or bone, but the real prize was those made from human teeth. After the Battle of Waterloo, dead soldiers were looted for more than their wallets and weapons, their obvious cause of death meaning that they were less likely to carry infections that could be transferred to the dentures' wearer.
2. Unibrows were in.
Many statues from Ancient Greece and Rome display prominent unibrows on their subjects. This is because instead of being seen as a flaw, the connected brow was considered the mark of wisdom and beauty. Men and women would blacken their natural brows with powder, and if the effect wasn't strong enough, would fashion false brows from goats' hair and resin.
3. In 1700s France, fashion magazines were huge!
We may think that periodicals like Vogue are a modern invention, but even before the invention of photography, wealthy aristocrats in France were devouring their own fashion mags. Hand-drawn by numerous artists, these magazines were often published as often as every 10 days, and one was expected to keep up with the times.
4. False beauty marks named for house flies.
With diseases like smallpox rampant, many European people were left with scarring that they began to cover with silk or velvet patches. In France, where they were called "mouches" after the flies they resembled, it became trendy to have patches in shapes like the moon and stars.
5. Wigs that hid syphilis symptoms.
A major, obvious symptom of syphilis is hair loss, and at a time where it was fashionable for men and women to have long hair, those who suffered from the disease turned to wigs. When Louis XIV and Charles II soon after began to wear wigs to hide their own thinning hair, it went from a necessity to the fashionable thing. Since wigs were easier to delouse, many opted to shave their heads entirely.
6. Poufs were literal rats' nests.
Made famous by Marie Antoinette, giant hairstyles called "poufs" were the rage. Often built with frames, cushions, and fake hair, the elaborate 'dos were meant to last a week or two before being taken down. Women would sleep sitting up, and pomade of fats and scented oils was used to keep everything in place. The fanciest pomade was made from lard, which would go rancid and begin to attract vermin.
7. When radium was in our makeup.
In a severe case of the beauty industry jumping on a new scientific breakthrough before it was fully understood, for much of the first half of the 20th century, cosmetics were made with radium powder, touting radium's anti-aging properties.
8. Though there was that lead makeup too.
Lest you think radium was the first toxic ingredient people slathered on their skin, you can't forget about the most famous of them all: white lead makeup. In the days when being pale was a mark of aristocracy, women would use white powder to enhance the effect. The most common side effects were hair loss and blackened skin.
9. Foreheads were in for Elizabeth I.
In addition to the white lead makeup being used, women in Elizabethan England often plucked or shaved their brows and hairlines to achieve the illusion of a massive forehead. Hair was swept back from the face to increase the effect.
10. Men were as constricted as the women.
In Regency England, the ideal man was slender with shapely legs to fill out his tight breeches. Of course, not all men are blessed with that natural shape, and so they too were cinched tight with corsets. Those with less muscular legs resorted to padding.
11. How about a nice dung bath?
You read that right: "dung," not "mud." Romans believed in the rejuvenating power of bathing in pools of animal feces, with their absolute favorite being that of crocodiles found along the Nile River.
12. Nothing whitens teeth better than urine.
Lest you think crocodile dung was the grossest beauty treatment the Romans practiced, they also used human urine as mouthwash. It was the ammonia that made it work, and urine was an ingredient in mouthwashes until the 18th century. However, the Romans believed that the best came from Portugal and imported it specifically.
13. Too much makeup may mean you're a witch.
For all the work expected to look beautiful, in the 18th century the British Parliament announced that a marriage could be annulled if a woman was found to have used makeup, perfume, wigs, etc. to aid her in catching her husband. The husband would walk away cleanly, but the wife was likely to be tried for witchcraft.
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